Okay, so you've been inspired by a song, book, or movie, and decide it's time for change. Upon making your decision, you elicit the support of a coach or counsellor and start the work.

Growing in awareness, you identify areas where change is needed to improve your life. However, you soon realise that some have an opinion about your decisions, and that others are expressing their unhappiness.

These responses to your efforts may not be what you'd hoped for. In fact, you might feel disappointed or frustrated at what feels like a lack of support from those you'd have expected more from.

As a result, you may start to question your decision to make the changes you believe will improve your life, or consider giving up. And if this was the case, you wouldn't be alone. Why?

Because when you determine to better your life, you'll likely encounter three types of people:

1. Those unable to understand your motivation for wanting to change,
2. Those unable to envision a future with a different version of you, and
3. Those who feel unable to create a better future for themselves.

Let’s look at each of them briefly: 

1. Unable to understand your motivation for change

With this first group it helps to communicate your values. More so, not only what matters to you, but how what matters to you is shaping your choices, habits and decision making process.

For example, if you decide to reduce your alcohol consumption to improve your physical and financial wellbeing, it might be helpful for these people to know what's motivating your new choices when out socialising.

2. Unable to envision a future with a different you

It helps to recognise where this group rely on you to meet their needs in some way. As a result, they may fear how changes in the way you approach life (and your relationship) may negatively impact them.

So, having become accustomed to how you relate to them, this second group need to have their expectations managed. It's not your fault, but failing to do so could result in them growing disappointed, sad, or angry.

3. Unable to create a better future for themselves

This last group feel incapable of making changes in their own lives, so may struggle to observe your progress. Sadly, your success serves to highlight where they believe they're failing, which for them is hard.

With this third group, it's important to manage how much energy and time you invest. It also helps to have clear boundaries, as you want to be around those who encourage and support the vision you have for your best self.

Summary

When you determine to better your life, there'll be those who celebrate and support you. However, there'll be others who find it harder to adjust to what they see, or come to terms with the changes you're making.

Being aware of these three groups of people is key to making continual progress. For in recognising them you'll be better able to navigate your relationships in a way that increases your chances of long-term success.

You see, when it comes to improving your life it cannot be overstated; that who you surround yourself with, really does matter.

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If you think you might benefit from working with a coach, book a free Exploration Call with me to talk about what working together might look like.

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Photo credit: @derstudi