Are you tired of workplace politics, pretense, and the games people play? Sick of the manipulator?
If you’d like someone to do something to help towards meeting your organisational or personal goals, simply ask them.
Don’t beat around the bush with small talk.
Just get to the point, make the request, and give the instruction.
But first be sure about what you want them to do and be clear; ambiguity is a cause of relational stress and burnout in any context.
And most importantly, don’t play games.
Why ask somebody to think about whether they want to do something, or make suggestions about how something could be done, if you’ve no intention of taking on board their suggestions or concerns, and suitably addressing them?
That’s farcical and disrespectful. That’s power play.
The truth is, nobody likes to feel manipulated. And to constantly feel like a cog in a wheel isn’t the most rewarding or motivating for even the more sanguine of personality types.
Unless of course, the cog is regularly oiled.
So be aware of this, for it will catch up with you. As more often that not, though they may remain silent, people aren’t naive to office politics – the games people play.
For where you haven’t built relationships with your subordinates, you’ll realise before long their hesitance to meet ‘your’ goals. You’ll come unstuck.
The solution? Get to know them. I’ll say it again, get to know them.
In doing so you’re better equipped to support, add value, and demonstrate your genuine motivation for their well-being and development — a motivation that ought to extend beyond your organisational goals.
But in all you do, be consistent. Avoid being overly friendly one day and totally ignoring them the next, as unfortunately, this doesn’t communicate genuineness, and wanes trust.
So if consistency befits relationship and relationships befit results, stop playing games with people.
Are there relationships you need to be developing with those you work with?
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